Do you ever feel like you’re spinning your wheels, stuck in place? That no matter how much you try, something just isn’t clicking?
If you’re nodding along, trust me—you’re not alone. We’ve all been there.
Feeling stuck is one of the most frustrating experiences. You can have all the tools, all the strategies, even all the motivation…and still feel like you’re not moving forward. Whether it’s in your career, your personal life, or just your general sense of progress, sometimes it feels like you’re banging on a door that just won’t open.
But here’s the thing. More often than not, it’s not the door that’s the problem.
It’s the way we’re looking at it.
Today, I want to share my favourite mindset tip—the one that’s helped me unstick myself time and time again. It’s simple but powerful, and it’s all about making a quick pivot in perspective.
Sometimes, all it takes to get moving again is a subtle shift in the way we see things.
Let’s dive in.
Why We Get Stuck: The Trap of Linear Thinking
Before we talk about the tip itself, let’s look at why we get stuck in the first place.
A big part of it has to do with what I call linear thinking.
When we have a goal, we tend to picture a straight line from Point A (where we are) to Point B (where we want to be). The problem is that real life rarely unfolds in a straight line. More often, it’s a messy, zigzagging path full of detours, setbacks, and unexpected turns.
When we’re stuck, it’s usually because we’re clinging to the idea that things should look a certain way. By now, I should be here. I should have achieved X by this age. This problem should have been solved already.
But that “should” mindset is a trap. It keeps us fixated on one version of success, even if that version isn’t serving us.
So what’s the answer? How do we break free from linear thinking and find our way forward?
Here’s my tip: When you feel stuck, look for a different question.
The Power of Asking a Different Question
When you’re up against a roadblock, your first instinct is probably to ask, How do I get past this? Or, Why isn’t this working?
These questions make sense—but they’re pretty limiting. They keep your focus locked on what isn’t happening or on the obstacles in your way.
You’re essentially asking, “How do I bulldoze through this?” And sometimes, no amount of bulldozing is going to work.
Instead, try asking yourself a different question. One that invites you to look at the situation from a fresh angle.
Here are a few examples that have helped me when I felt stuck:
“What’s one thing I haven’t tried yet?”
“How would I look at this problem if I was giving advice to a friend?”
“What’s one small win I could create today, even if it doesn’t solve the whole problem?”
“Is there a way to turn this challenge into an opportunity?”
“What am I assuming about this situation that might not be true?”
Each of these questions has the power to change your perspective in an instant. Instead of focusing on what you can’t do, you’re shifting your attention to what you might do. And sometimes, that’s all it takes to crack open the door and let a little light in.
Let me tell you a story about a time when this approach saved me.
A Personal Story: How One Question Changed Everything
A few years back, I was working on a big project. It was the kind of thing I’d been dreaming about for a long time, and I was all in.
But halfway through, I hit a wall. Suddenly, every little step felt hard. I’d sit down to work, and it was like pulling teeth. Nothing flowed. Every time I tried to push forward, I felt resistance.
My initial reaction was frustration. Why is this so hard? Why can’t I just get through this?
I kept banging my head against that same wall, day after day, trying to force my way through. And the more I pushed, the more stuck I felt.
Finally, one morning, after yet another unproductive day, I decided to try something different. I closed my laptop, sat back, and asked myself a new question:
“If I knew this was going to take twice as long as I’d planned, would I still be as stressed about it?”
The question hit me like a splash of cold water. Because the truth was, I was putting all this pressure on myself to get it done quickly, as if there was some invisible deadline I had to meet.
But when I asked myself that question, I realized…there was no rush. I’d created this deadline in my mind, and it was completely arbitrary.
That small shift made all the difference. Suddenly, I felt lighter. I took the pressure off myself, and with that freedom, my creativity came back.
I stopped thinking of the project as something to “get through” and started seeing it as something I could enjoy again.
And wouldn’t you know it? Within a few weeks, I was further along than I’d ever expected to be.
Why This Works: The Science of Cognitive Flexibility
This isn’t just a motivational trick—it’s backed by psychology.
When we’re stuck, it’s often because we’ve fallen into a pattern of rigid thinking. Psychologists call this cognitive fixation. It’s when we’re so focused on one solution, one outcome, or one path that we can’t see any alternatives.
By asking a different question, you’re practicing cognitive flexibility. You’re training your brain to think outside the box, to find creative solutions, and to embrace the idea that there’s more than one way forward.
Studies have shown that people with high cognitive flexibility are better at problem-solving, more resilient, and less likely to feel overwhelmed in the face of challenges.
So when you ask yourself a different question, you’re not just shifting your mindset—you’re rewiring your brain to be more adaptable and resourceful.
Putting It into Practice: How to Use This Tip in Your Own Life
Alright, so how can you make this mindset shift part of your daily life?
Here’s a simple, three-step process you can use whenever you’re feeling stuck:
Pause and Acknowledge the Stuckness.
First things first, don’t fight the feeling. If you’re frustrated, acknowledge it.
Say to yourself, “Okay, I’m feeling stuck. That’s normal. It just means something needs to change.”
This stops you from spiralling into negativity and opens up space for curiosity.Ask a New Question.
Choose one of the questions I mentioned earlier, or make up your own. The goal is to find a question that shifts your focus from what you can’t do to what you might do.
If you’re struggling, ask yourself, “What would I ask if I were looking at this situation from a completely fresh perspective?”Experiment with an Answer.
Once you have a new question, try an experiment. Pick one small action you could take based on your new perspective, even if it feels minor.
Sometimes, the tiniest step in a new direction is all you need to start building momentum.
A Final Thought
When we feel stuck, it’s easy to think the answer lies outside ourselves. A new tool, a new strategy, maybe even a new life.
But so often, the solution is simply a shift in perspective. It’s about letting go of the need for things to look a certain way and opening ourselves up to a different view.
So next time you’re feeling stuck, remember: it’s not about forcing your way through. It’s about stepping back, taking a breath, and asking yourself, What am I not seeing?
A new question. A quick pivot. That’s all it takes to break free.
Try it for yourself, and let me know what you discover.
Nice, easy three-step process. In my professional career as an RN, I’ve always had to look at things from multiple different angles, and asked a lot of questions to better serve my patients. It was always a little tougher in my personal life… who knows why, but it doesn’t matter. I found that when I exhaust my efforts and my questions and everything I know I look to someone else who should know. Sometimes I need to do it a little sooner than I do 😉